Because of his skill and love for facilitating dialogue, I suggested that Todd read Patricia Ryan Madson’s book, Improv Wisdom. The next time I saw Todd was during our Strategic Story work in Oklahoma. He had efficiently read Madson’s book and surprised me with his action review. It seems the imprint from the reading was effectively personal. He told me about how conscious he had become of how often he was saying “No” to his children. Todd began to look for ways to say “Yes” to them. While he found it difficult to express, it was clear this practice of ‘yes’ was having a meaningful Impact−on both the children and on Todd.
In his book, Hope Against Darkness, Richard Rohr calls us to a collective transformation. Like Richard I believe this possible only as we “rebuild” ourselves−as we allow our own transformation.
It’s the deep yeses that carry you through. It’s that deeper something you are strongly for that allows you to wait it out. −Rohr
As a dad, Todd is most definitely for his children. This deeper something makes it easy for him to open to his own transformation.
The legacy of true leadership is built by the influential presence of an attentive and active individual.
Yes, because of my own movement toward contemplative practice, I believe effective leadership flows only when an individual has balanced personal attentiveness (contemplation) and action.
We know so much “no” because of how easy it is to begin there. But why is it easy? It is unfortunately so because of reactive betrayal. We betray our true self when we immediately serve unconscious patterns of judgmental reaction.
The leadership life−yes, and all of life and living−is about effortlessly holding ambiguity; the mystery in our own Trueness. The first holding, and balance, must be for self. This is a commitment to one’s own Personal/Professional Growth. It is such obligation that sustains balance in a seemingly out-of-balance world. By holding I mean a relaxed position with reality. This is what “yes” does; opens us to see what is before us clearly−through a lens unclouded. We are continually learning to put aside all need for judgment and assessment.
Let me be clear, it is not about only yes. It is more about being open−beginning with yes, and from such beginning learning to consistently balance yes and no.
As I have delightfully discovered, it is easier to say “Yes” to others when we are becoming more secure in our own yes. Our Impact in this world demands present attention and focused intention.
Yes is transforming simply because it invites you into the present and purifies intent … right where you stand.